Saturday, April 30, 2005

Zoe

Hello
In our continuing series of songs being reviewed on GarageBand.com, we have made our way through the review cycle of "Zoe" here is all the info about the song and the reviews that it received. Reviewers are also able to give extra credit to certain elements of a song, a list of the extra credit awards will be shown after all the reviews. See you next time with, "Today".

Zoe(2:59)


Score 3.3 out of 5.0
#85 of 191 in Current Experimental Rock
#420 of 1,382 in All-Time Experimental Rock

History
Zoe appears on the Buddha All-Star album, Hello. This song was originally recorded in 1998, with Jeff on Guitar, Rob on Drums, and Scott on Keys. In 2003 Adam added vocals, with backing from Mic and Scott, lyrics were written by Mic. It's about a stripper. This song made it past the 1st round of reviews but did not do good enough to make it to the 2nd round, the reviews that are past the 1st round are against songs in the rock category, which explains some of the change in opinion of the song in the first 10 reviews listed, reviews after that are from the experimental category.

Lyrics
She had a lisp when she talked
She shook her shingdig when she walked
Hairy things beneath her arms
I felt her hands then heard alarms

Zoe, Zoe, don't trip on no dollars
Zoe, Zoe, don't slip on no dollars
Slowly, Slowly, Slowly, Zoe

Seen her police cap on the bar
Inside of it there was a jar
I asked her, "Babe what's in the jar?"
She said, "Well kid, I'm a star"

Zoe, Zoe, don't trip on no dollars
Zoe, Zoe, don't slip on no dollars
Slowly, Slowly, Slowly, Zoe

She had a lisp when she talked
Her shingdig when she walked
Hairy things beneath her arms
I felt her hands then heard the charms

Zoe, Zoe, don't trip on no dollars
Zoe, Zoe, don't slip on no dollars
Slowly, Slowly, Slowly, Zoe

Reviews
Everybody must get stoned
The "homage" paid to Dylan is done pretty badly, and how can this be experimental, it was done by Dylan!!!!!! or at least that what it sounded like to me. The drum line i think is almost the same. There is a point where i really think everyone stopped listening to eah other, and lost the vibe alltogeher. I just was waiting for a howling dog to enter into it. Acually i think it would have made the song "better". If this song is meant to be funny (which it's not funny) i think the howling dog would be perfect! maybe two, at least THEY would be listening. The guitar during the verse is all over the place. and it accually sounds like the vox and axe are competing. The song might be funny if it was somewhat original, but the performance,sound and interaction of the musicians prohibits any potential "good" luaghter. It also sounds like some of the lyrics say "smoke weed" if this is the case you need to smoke a whole lot more to make this song enjoyable.
So get yourself a couple of hounds and smoke yorself about a pound and please please please improve your sound!
- growler69 from Chicago (Nw Burbs), Illinois on 26Apr2005

hell to my ears
This could be really really horrible but somehow, the way the single mic (lo-fi techniques I'm presuming) picks up the individual instruments it sounds more like a cross between the eels and tom waits. Which is nice. Really floppy bass drum sound which suits the terribley over distorted and randomly out of tune guitar. It all fits together superbly. Really exciting. Most bands who would try a song this horrible would go over the top. But you guys show musical restraint and create an almost ambient piece. Which is awesome. Wanna hear more
- plattishness from Preston, England, United Kingdom on 26Apr2005

Slide Rule...
I like the interplay between the slide guitar and the vocals. The sparse piano part was cool...it gets the job done. The only problem I see is the piece is aimless and wandering. MILES DAVIS ran into this same problem and later corrected it...you should study some of his later compositions for inspiration (post 'Bitches Brew'). I like this track...it's got a vast amount of potential!
- Sonic_Man from Buras, Louisiana on 25Apr2005

Review
The guitar/violin/ whatever the hell that noise is that got way lost in the production, actually sounds really cool. It reminds me of some of wilcos experimentation with feedback and blank noise in their recent albums. But dear god man, only oh so much random noise is managable, this just gets annoying by the second minute.
- dugg from Dallas, Texas on 25Apr2005

what the
i have no clue whats going on is this a song? or just noise and someone talking very weird sound you got there
- justincharlesneese from Bridgeview, Illinois on 25Apr2005

Acid Torture Chamber.
O.K. this is definitely melodicly dissodant. i like the lyrics. Hippy electro shock therapy? I like the evil smiegel choruses. The guitar is creative. The Piano is reminicent of redneck dwarves breaking beer bottles. Word.
- Cedro from Tollhouse, California on 24Apr2005

tighten up
im not sure if a "loose" sound was your intention...if so...nice job...if not...well then...i liked the vocalist's style...best part of the song....close second was the bluesy, almost beck style guitar....drums were off..but again that may be the intention....piano was simple....almost too simple to be off beat....good luck!!!
- bipolarvibe from Jersey City, New Jersey on 24Apr2005

music for glue huffers.
THIS SONG IS TRYING TO BE HARD ON THE EARS.GOOD JOB.everything sounds like it is being played by glue huffers,and the more i listen to it,the more i feel like i have hit the sticky bag too.i'm out ...this sucks.
- BattleshipEthel from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada on 23Apr2005

Noisy
I guess I really just don't get it. I't hard to make out what the lyrics are except at the end where I think you are saying "sorry". Well, in the words of P. Townshend, 'You are Forgiven'.
- Niacisum from De Kalb, Illinois on 22Apr2005

trying
Lo fi big time! hard to find some good in here, who's killing the cat!
- Mckael from Oberstdorf, Bavaria, Germany on 22Apr2005

Wilco teams up with a very drunk Eric Clapton
i really like the sound effects and noise in the intro... this really reminds me of bands like wilco and radiohead...its like those artists mixed with early eric clapton on crack...this song is very original in its own kinda way....the indie feel in this song, also, is very catchy...GREAT SONG!!!
- ToddEvanDavis from Cabot, Arkansas on 21Apr2005

good
folky experiment rock reminds me of some old beck stuff. I dig it sounds like a better recording might bring out the sounds a bit more otherwise good job
- honestgod from Mohonk Lake, New York on 21Apr2005

lo fi suburban blues?
At first this reminded me of early Ween. Then, it reminded me of early Ween and early Beck. The lo fi recording quality totally works in the song's favor and adds to the vibe of careless abandon. The absence of distorted guitar chords is a pleasant change. This non traditional take on the blues isn't entirely original, but this group has put a zany spin on it at least.
- boatwalker from Unspecified on 19Apr2005

lets kill mainstreet
Great intro, is an invitation for an insane sound, the guitars are sweet-slide-delicious, great work to the guitar player (coming from a guitarist), the percussion have a nice cowboy be bop, the voice have attitude(the most important thing), and i want to give a really nice credit for the mix, is a really good work.
Is nice to hear this
The Pilots
- YorkO from Mexico City, Edo.Mx, Mexico on 18Apr2005

Interesting
Cool sound guys. The vocals are ok but could be better. The song does get kind of boring though and could be more dynamic. I like the guitar. Decent song guys, you just need some better production.
- Chimeshadow from Santa Barbara, California on 18Apr2005

Slide-Happy
Are you waltzing on purpose, or is that cause of the booze? This has kind of a Beatles-esque sound to it, with even more drugs and alcohol involved. Yeah, it's like Beck gets together with the Beatles to jam. Very psychedelic feel and just plain insane sounding. I like it though.
- bhodges01 from Stillwater, Oklahoma on 18Apr2005

my grandmother is back!
i wonder when this recording is made. it reminds me old blues LPs.
General feeling of the song is very good. But i think 3 minutes is very long for this recording quality; and for your ears. different 'though.
- Emre from Istanbul, Fatih, Turkey on 18Apr2005

Rough DA
The rouggh low production is great, i love rough dirty earthy grounded to the dirt stuff, i like the slide going on, it's what it is and i know your intentions, or so i think, I won't say much, the sound is rough and you know it, keep up expermenting
- LaExistance from Chicago, Illinois on 17Apr2005

Biscuit Monster
The beginning remonds me of a biscuit monster wich should be the main character in the video....thrashing and knocking shit over in a 7-11. Scaring the hell out of everthing in it's path.........until the Brillo Beast steps up and proceeds to KICK SOME ASS - THEN BOTH OF THEM START TO GROW UNTIL THEY ARE STEPPING ON CARS DURING RUSH HOUR AND EATING THEM - The news reporters can't say shit cuz it's the REAL DEAL
- Hamrick from Denver, Colorado on 17Apr2005

Industrial Honkey-Tonk
Though the production quality is very poor, or perhapse thats part of the mystic, this very bizarre song has some mojo. The vocals are awesome very distant and kind of whiney blues style. The overall sound and arrangment has a Tom Waits style to it. Guitar has a saw sound to it. Although you may have written or created this song in an anrchistic way it is pretty cool.
- SexandMachines from Santa Rosa, California on 17Apr2005

not a bad song
your song was overall pretty good, but a few things that could have made it better are; a better recording it wasnt bad, but it could have been better. Second the lead singers voice was kind of high and I thought that it cracked. And third the drums and the tamberine werent really it time with each other.
- emerge07 from Unspecified on 17Apr2005

Lo-Fi...the real Deal. No kidding you!!!
Wow. What can say. Some people will hate it but me ,with my eclectic taste, LOVE IT. Kind of like the first time I heard the Velvet Underground. Anyway I like the minimalist production. Drums are great. No bass...why not!
------ACE------
- Alick from London, East London, United Kingdom on 17Apr2005

lo fi
this is one the more original things i've encountered, very low fi, reminds me a little of early flaming lips but has a bluesy thing going on. i really like the beginning, actually this is very basement tapes-y and the vocalist reminds me of rick danko a little.
cool stuff. inspired.
- jeremyradway from Unspecified on 16Apr2005

nice emotion
Nice emotion. Too bad u dont have better production for this one because i can tell that it has potential. I like the swaying beat
- lecko from Unspecified on 15Apr2005

noisey southern goodness
This song is recorded, played and sang awfully... on purpose! Good song with a neat excecution and the mix isn't half bad. The slide is a lil high up, but I dig this song, wish it was a little faster. The vocals are sang in a almost inaudible careless style through a bad mic or a fx pedal. The fuzz of the whole song helps us know that we are in weird territory and there is an unlikely chance that we will be leaving in other other way.. And so the song trudges forth slowly and just in case you hadn't noticed the singer is repeating the word slowly, and the noise seems to continue as the song dies. I like this type of stuff, much like Julius Caesar era Smog with a nice slide guitar barely making sense over the distracting drums. All of wich seems intentional, so I will side with the artists here and assume they know what they are doing and assume I like what they are doing as well. Assumtion can be a key to experimental rock.
- mrarashi from Reno, Nevada on 15Apr2005

I hate to give bad reviews, but...
Um....Don't know what to say but that was pretty bad. I don't know at level musicians you are but you have a ways to go, but there is nothing wrong with sounding bad we all did at one time and you to will pass this phase.
Don't give up even the best sounded bad at one time.
- rbrooks55 from Santee, California on 15Apr2005

aerosmith on acid
this sounds like aerosmith and pink floyd on some seriously good acid. the slide guitar is great. the sound could be a little better but for the most part it works great. just a little more clarity would have been nice. sounds like a room recording. this song could be great in a drunken bout of mass depression. whiskey and pain killers.
- LowFi from New Haven, Connecticut on 15Apr2005

well..
Sounds pretty out of tune to say the least and out of time. I have trouble appreciating trhat for an entire song. The vocals are ok from what i can hear. The production is real bad.
- CraZyPickleZ from Edmonton, Alberta on 15Apr2005

ACTUALLY DIFFERENT
REALLY ORIGINAL. EVEN THOUGH THERE ARE A LOT OF ATONAL CHANGES GOING ON, THERE ARE ALSO LITTLE GEMS OF MELODY THAT FLUTTER THROUGHOUT THE MIX. I DUG THE SLIDE GUITAR. I LIKED WHAT I COULD HEAR OF THE LYRICS. ALL IT REMINDED ME OF IS A REALLY EXPERIMENTAL BECK.
- Sola from Stratford, New Jersey on 15Apr2005

Extra Credit Awards
Originality-8
Mood-5
Guitar-5
Drums-3
Male Vocals-3
Beat-3
Production-2
Stupidest Song Ever-2
Best Feel Good Song-1
Most Rocking Song-1
Most Bitter Breakup Song-1
Melody-1

7 Mile

Hi-diddly-ho
In our continuing series of songs being reviewed on GarageBand.com, we have made our way through the review cycle of "7 Mile" here is all the info about the song and the reviews that it received. Reviewers are also able to give extra credit to certain elements of a song, a list of the extra credit awards will be shown after all the reviews. See you momentarily with, "Zoe".

7 Mile(4:58)


Score 1.5 out of 5.0
#138 of 142 in Current Groove Rock
#1427 of 1435 in All-Time Groove Rock

History
This song appeared on the Tonto Savalas album, Manifesto. Jeff sings and plays guitar, Rob plays bass, and Mick is the drummer and does the intro. The song was most likely recorded sometime in 1998. Jeff did the production work on it. It's also worth mentioning that this is the first song that we did not put up in Experimental Rock and it suffered because of that.

Lyrics
Mick-Rock, I said Rock, I said Rock and Roll

Jeff-Those girls on 7 Mile
I think they were call girls
I don't think that they were too expensive
Because they weren't dressed too nice

Those girls were hookers

Reviews
a few things
this live recording sounds really cheap. it's a tired formula. I feel like your song is a joke that I don't get. The singing needs much work. ditoo for the bass drums and guitar.
- Pileofned from Hicksville, New York on 27Apr2005

????
Very muddy recording. Not sure I understand the point of this song. None of the parts of the band are fitting together at all. It sounds like everyone is playing a different song. Keep trying guys!
- getung from Calgary, Alberta, Canada on 27Apr2005

review
tuning is always a good idea.... great vocals definatley can tell though this is a live recording... great work!!
- LiquidHarvest from Charleston, West Virginia on 26Apr2005

I don't like the I say rock
the song would have been better without the introduction. The vocal key is off pitch and bouncy. I don't really care for it.
- lindsaymaestas47 from Colorado Springs, Colorado on 26Apr2005

Good intro YEAH ROCK
Is this a live recording? Sounds like a tape recorder in the middle of a room. The singer sings off key. I cant go on.
- jonni_starfish from Sarnia, Ontario, Canada on 26Apr2005

zykes!---drunken midget aliens have taken over your garage
ok, lose the spinal tap beginning unless you're in high school. too gargebandish for me. drum part is boring and the cymals dont sound good. bass sound is too full of effects. i will say that the band plays together well. vocals are terrible.
- LIGHTNINGHAND from Sacramento, California on 25Apr2005

abc
alot of attention is needed on this track..levels are off..practice the song more before recording again..track has no hook or solid melody line..vox need work..too long-make it short and sweet..overall mix needs work..good luck
- overhill_nj from Blackwood, New Jersey on 24Apr2005

Not sure
the song doesnt seem to fit with itself, as if there are two different keys going on at the same time. the guitars are too heavy, and it doesn't really groove too much. the guitars are too heavy, and so is the bass, and the singing doesn't fit. my advice would be to regroup, and try to find a different heavy sound that fits with each other, because sometimes songs that don't fit could sound good, or bad, and you guys wound up drawing the short end of the straw with that one. sorry, but i think the song needs to be completely redone, because absolutely nothing fits in it.
- tamadrummer1422 from Wallingford, Pennsylvania on 23Apr2005

practice makes perfect
I like the intro idea, but the ensuing musical intro is not strong enough to support it. Jamming on changes is cool for rehearsal and sometimes live performances, but for a recording, cut it to a minimum. The lead vocalist needs to watch his intonation and enunciation. It's cool sometimes to just belt, but that should be few and far between. The audience needs to trust your ability to sing in tune and with precision when you choose. The belting should be selected, not the only option. Mixwise, when there is a guitar solo, bring it up front. It was pretty buried in everything else. The guitar is much colder in the mix than anything else. Vocals are too hot, as are the drums. The structure of the song is not clearly defined. It feels like a jam session. Nothing wrong with this, but if you want to develop your songwriting, you're gonna need to step away from that for a while.
- intervisionary from Milwaukie, Oregon on 21Apr2005

did he say 7 mile
being from detroit, the first lyric that stood out was the phrase "7 mile" if thats what he said. The recording of this song sounded really raw. This really sounded like it was recorded in a garage, or a tiny hole in the wall bar, for the tone of the song the recordeing quality went well with, but i wouldn't mind hearing a more clean-cut version. I really liked all the end of the song, especially the build of of percussion with the pause afterward. The end of the song reminded me of hendrix and a band of gypsys.
- persiphone_is from Woodhaven, Michigan on 21Apr2005

this is some homestyle
fortunatly, this type of music works well and sounds well coming off of a dirty cassette tape straight out of a boombox, which is what i'm assuming this was recorded with. very 70's hendrix sounding little cobainyness.
- driveshaft from Fort Wayne, Indiana on 20Apr2005

???
a very garage type recording. I can't really tell what your going for here. Tighten up the screws here and I think it could be alot better. A little theory or structure would help as well.
- jlehto from Sheboygan, Wisconsin on 19Apr2005

Live Drunk guitar
Sorry guys this song is horrible.Off key vocals and terrible sounding guitar...either out of tune or just plain ugly.I have nothing good to say about this song...ex-cept the drumms were played with competance.
- Nitromeistro from Puyallup, Washington on 19Apr2005

Are you serious?
Come on man. I'm not putting any effort into a review if you don't put any into the song.
- ndelc from Albuquerque, New Mexico on 19Apr2005

nice intro
i was laughing at the dude yelling rock and roll. quite funny. As far as the rock and roll goes, it seems that it is lacking a bit of energy here in the beginning. Guitar could be turned up a bit more. vocals could use some effect of some sort, to make it sound more full. out of key at some points, maybe check that out and try to improve on it. nothing really excites me about this track. It's not bad, it's not the best. keep on jamming and making some cool songs. yeah
- bgiacomi from West Lafayette, Indiana on 18Apr2005

Jammin!!
A young band jamming in the basement, I dig it. The vocals are cool, wild and a little scarey. The drummer is pretty solid. The guitar is cool. Everybody sounds like they have the potential to kick ass one day. Keep practicing and getting tighter!
- skeeboknight from Macon, Georgia on 18Apr2005

great bassline
It has a real good bass line that keeps the song moving. Music is good and well rounded. Sounds like a real good jam session.
- DownsideCole from Unspecified on 15Apr2005

no rock + no roll = boring
Well, there's definitely no rock happening here- that's for sure. There's absolutely no songwriting skills portrayed here whatsoever, just pure thoughtless and sloppy wankery. From the absolutely atrocious vocals (terrbile pitch, mundane phrasing and outright dumb lyrics) to the shoddy guitar solo (meaningless shred-fest) there's nothing here for the listener. Congratulations on your self indulgent drivel- come back when you've got somthing to offer. You guys would get torn to shreds in a high scholl talent show.
- tractorj0hn from Presque Isle, Maine on 15Apr2005

GARAGEband
A true garageband! Recorded in dad's garage? Bet this was fun to record BUT....lead guitarist hit his share of 'clams' - vocalist also had his share of sour notes. Mix was set on "11's" all the way through. Too much. I wouldn't play this song out in public in this present form but its perfect for your dad's garage. Nope, couldn't get into your groove.
- TXsweetchild from San Antonio, Texas on 12Apr2005

Different Sound
I like the vocalist in the song. He sounds like Jimmy Hendrix mixed with Jim Morrison. I think that the levels on the track are a bit off. I think that the lead guitar needed to be turned up. The song is different from all the music I've heard. Heavy stuff.
- AlfredVillarino from El Monte, California on 10Apr2005

Extra Credit Awards
Stupidest Song Ever-3
Mood-2
Drums-1

Friday, April 22, 2005

Suecide Me

Hello Everybody
In our continuing series of songs being reviewed on GarageBand.com, we have made our way through the review cycle of "Suecide Me" here is all the info about the song and the reviews that it received. Reviewers are also able to give extra credit to certain elements of a song, a list of the extra credit awards will be shown after all the reviews. See you next time with, "7 Mile".

Suecide Me(4:51)


Score 2.5 out of 5.0
#165 of 194 in Current Experimental Rock
#1115 of 1,374 in All-Time Experimental Rock

History
This was on the Tonto Savalas album, Honey Mustard. As far as I know, this is a song about a love/hate relationship between Mick and an ex of his named Sue. This song was recorded most likely in the fall of 1995 with all vocals and instrumentation being done by Mic. Scott produced it.

Lyrics
In general I'm much to lazy to put up lyrics, maybe some nice soul will edit them into this post. I actually did try writing them but there were too many things that I didn't know.

Reviews
i loooooove piano intros to rock songs!!
First of all im not even a piano player and i love this intro...unfortunatly the vocals are kinda like a bad roger waters, although this does sound like it could be off the wall.
- Bluffmusic from South Salem, New York on 20Apr2005

High hopes torn down
In the beginning, a song has an introduction. Then, with other intstruments or chords, the song progresses. In this case, the song represses with addition of the vocals. Maybe the straining of the voice is supposed to show the listener how desparate the vocalist really is. However, the lulling of the first piano riff is what caught my attention and that would have to be the strong point of the recording.
- thetimelinepost from Unspecified on 20Apr2005

Sloppy with Swagger
The piano is excellent. The singing is a bit annoying. The way it's delivered reminds me of Daniel Johnston or Wesley Willis.Don't care for it much.If that's the plan then it' works.
- jrumbass from Raleigh, North Carolina on 20Apr2005

Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God
You suck so hard I thought I was listening to gay porn. Aggghhhhhh
what are you trying to do man.
Please for the love of god just stop. and for the guy who is going to review my review. listen to this fucking song and tell me I am wrong. this is just Mean to subject a real musician to this.
this is something I would have done at the age of 4. Know what
I am not even going to be nice anymore. Fuck you you talentless fucking shitbag. you wasted my time. I blow fart bubbles in my bath With more talent. you worthless asshole Fuck Off and die
- jayceerocker from College Point, Queens, New York on 17Apr2005

Alright
The Piano sounded really good. It had a really nice melody. It's just the singing i didn't like. It didn't seem like the singer could reach high notes very well. Kind of sounded like cats meowing.
- nickmccollum from Laotto, Indiana on 15Apr2005

this is oddly very good in the end except for..
This song starts off with a great piano run, i like the possibiltiy of it being really pretty now...oh shit!bad singer.a bit of a softie too.singing about killing himself i think.very dramatic,great in capturing a very dark and desparte mood. take a singing lesson, if you don't think you need it right now.Knd of a Flaming lips quality though, maybe this is what he is after.i really like those piano chords.i think someone takes a piss at 2:45 min... i think that is just weird.
- BattleshipEthel from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada on 15Apr2005

kill me now
oh my god.learn to sing, it pains me to finish the song, the piano is good but that voice just sucks any deep thought or emotion from the song. gawd! it's actually cracking me up, i'd finish the song but its making my logic deteriorate as we speak. i am putting myself in danger of going tone deaf if i listen to anymore. please don't ever sing again. wait, even the backup singer can't sing. jeez, can you just not hear yourself? ack like nails across a chalkboard
- maxheadlessness from Summersville, West Virginia on 14Apr2005

haunted
this song sounds like a ghost. or a memory. or drunks. i'm not sure. but i love it.
the hiss and the piano are what its all about.
is someone pissing during part of this song?
man i hope so.
- coyplott from Charlotte, North Carolina on 14Apr2005

Oh piano me baby
First of, dont ever, ever stop playing the piano its fantastic with its repeating melody. Also a bit weird paired up with the high Helium pitched vocals..nice lyrics though. Is that you takin a piss in the song? It made me smile with the water sound. The corius is very nice...now thers a good grating sound. over all its a good song.
- slowminded from Park Row, Texas on 13Apr2005

Slowminded happened to write us back about the song a couple of weeks later, this is what he had to say:
I still listen to the song "Suecide Me" on a daily basis, what a fucking great sound you have going on there, this song inspires me and the more I listen to it the more I feel like I've gaind something from it, be it inspiration, calmness, or the shear aggressiveness of it at times. Its a wonder that I just noticed how well the sped up part in the middle sounded against the backdrop of dark piano. Every time I hear this song I must give you props for the mood you set for the listener in this song.

Haunted by a freak?
The intro got me excited, as it sounds like a nice type of Mogwai, but the singing is not for me. Its probably the production/ recording situation, but it sounds distant: and a bit liek a mix between Iggy Pop and Ozzy Osbourne. The backup vocals scare me a bit as well. I did like the water effects. I know its supposed to be experimental, but this might be a bit too much for me.
- Apotropaic from Unspecified on 13Apr2005

Strange but intriguing me....
I really like the piano that I'm hearing. It's a lovely melody. I'm not sure what to make of the vocals. They're recorded a little harsh. Well, I consider myself honest so hear it goes...the vocals are very flat in most parts, as well, the harmony is way off. The piano really is a redeeming part of this recording. The vocals are recorded too loud. A compressor could help soften those harsh points in the mix. It sounds like someone's taking a leak. Seriously. That's what I hear. Is that water or something? This is so hard to listen to at points. Is it a joke? I'm seriuosly asking. If not, sorry, but it's really hard to listen to. I've reviewed 140 pairs of songs on Garageband and I have never said that before. We're near the end of your track now and I'll leave it by still saying that the basic piano melody is really quite pretty. Good luck to you.
- psaurini from Northglenn, Colorado on 13Apr2005

Very Wobbly
Pros:
The piano sample was nice, it fit the mood of the song nicely and had a nice "sway" to it. The lyrics had good emotion and fit the song well(From what I could understand of them.)

Cons:
The singer needs to know how to sing. His voice was very wobbly, and always either sharp or flat. The song was lacking in instrumentation. The piano sample would have went nicely with a guitar or even some hand drums (to keep the mellowness). I'm not sure what it was supposed to mean, but in the middle of the song it sounded like someone was taking a leak....not sure. This song could possibly have a lot of emotional power if you would clean it up, hit the right notes singing, and added something to accompany the piano.
Over-All 2 out of 10
- Sever_AL_ from Anniston, Alabama on 12Apr2005

emotion was belivable
horrible sound, horrible singer,
bad everything except for dynamic breakdown @ 2:25.
the most awful song i've ever heard!!!!
if you like WEEN thats cool but only they can pull off the badness of the boognish!!!!
the song is so bad...
the only good thing i have to say is that the emotion was belivable.
- dollar_bill from Colorado Springs, Colorado on 12Apr2005

Nice start
The start can define a song, this one is very musical, sad and the rain. Wow wait...the singer...the piano...the lyrics...therain...thesong...mmm...fell deep...asavior?...thepiano...hope the anguish is honest. Desperate noise, dark strokes of faith. Hope goes angry...walks with piano..and is still raining.
- LaExistance from Chicago, Illinois on 12Apr2005

pretty wasted?
Hissy distant sounding miked upright piano. Singing comes in -- the guy is sincere but doesn't have a good voice. Maybe kinda like Randy Newman. The singing is off key. Out of tune backups at about 1:50 don't help. Things shift to another chord structure at 2 minutes. Sounds like they shifted the tape speed or something. Running water or taking a leak or someting at 2:50 is interesting. I think these people were very drunk or high when they recorded. Maybe they are aiming for a Shane McGowan sort of thing.
- rcrath from Honolulu, Hawaii on 10Apr2005

Fine Piano Work on introduction...
Man, i don't know what to think really... I can't undertand the words so i can't respond to the lyrics. Nothing besides voice and piano? Well, the piano is splendid and the best thing you have working for you. It's delicate, nicely recorded and shows exceptional talent in the ebony and ivory department. Now abotu those vocals or lack thereof. It sounds liek you're making a joke really. Never on key at all that i could hear and hard to make out words or the language you're speaking. Weird to say the least.
Overall production is B-.
- damien_lucas from Valliant, Oklahoma on 10Apr2005

afloat in melancholy
drifting afloat on a grand piano. in an ocean of melancholy. depressing lyrics and vocals.made me think about snuff in it out.the burst of anger kinda sparatic like the change though. background vocals give alittle more depth to the song. overall its okay. i would have i nother person sing lyrics and have whoever singing now doing back up pieces for certain parts . other than the vocals love the piano
- bloodybutcher from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma on 6Apr2005

An experiment gone awry...
I hate to say this, but it sounds like a couple drunk people got behind a piano and started to sing way out of key without a key in the world. The song just didn't seem serious at all. It's almost as if you're making fun of yourselves. It's a shame, because it sounds like whoever is at the piano can actually play.
- OO@528253~629Management from Jacksonville, Florida on 6Apr2005

alrighty then
I like the piano part. Well written and atmospheric. The vocals on the other hand...?
I admire the passion, if thats what it was.., but unfortunately i dont think its a secret that anyone reviewing this would say the vocals are bad. I cant review the lyrics because they were completely masked in inaudible noise.
- schwagrotto from West Valley City, Utah on 6Apr2005

keep it instrumental
at least until you practice your vocals a lot. you're unable to stay on a note or reach the note you're going for. i'm not criticizing your STYLE, just your ability, which is purely up to practice. beautiful piano, though. hard to make things out when it gets loud, quality is too low.
haha, nice water sound. well, nice as in, it's funny you used a real water sound, cause most people would use a sample, but i guess you have to with this low fi home recording.
- Azgotzia from Unspecified on 5Apr2005

Extra Credit Awards
Each reviewer (out of the 20 reviews) is allowed to give as many awards as they see fit, the number after each award is the amount of times that aspect got an extra credit vote.

Keyboards-11
Mood-5
Melody-2
Originality-2
Production-2
Stupidest Song I've Ever Heard-2
Lyrics-1
Male Vocals-1
Smoochiest Love Song-1

Reviews mentioning the water sound-3
Reviews mentioning someone taking a piss-6

On GarageBand they have a section titled "Reviewers' Picks" these are sorted by genre. Songs within each genre receiving the most Extra Credit Awards for a specific element become the song of the week for that element. Well I forgot to mention that "Suecide Me" was awarded the reviewers pick award for the week of April 11th, 18th, and 25th, in the category of "Best Keyboards/Organ/Piano" and was the "Stupidest Song Ever" for the week of April 11th.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Communication Breakdown?

Have you ever wanted to communicate with the dead? I know I have. Now you can communicate with the dead! You only need some time, patience, and a little soldering experience and before you know it you will find yourself talking with the departed using your very own SPIRICOM MARK IV system.

Sunday, April 17, 2005

She Keeps Talking To Me

Hi y'all
In our continuing series of songs being reviewed on GarageBand.com, we have made our way through the review cycle of "She Keeps Talking To Me" here is all the info about the song and the reviews that it received. Reviewers are also able to give extra credit to certain elements of a song, a list of the extra credit awards will be shown after all the reviews. In addition, "She Keeps Talking To Me" was awarded song of the day on April 16th. See you next time with, "Suecide Me".

She Keeps Talking To Me (2:59)

Score 3.4 out of 5.0
#76 of 196 in Current Experimental Rock
#389 of 1,366 in All-Time Experimental Rock

History
This was on the Buddha All-Stars album, Hello. This song was recorded in two sessions. The 1st session took place in 1998 with Rob on Vocals and Mic on Guitar. In 2002, Adam added Background Vocals, Guitar, and assorted Percussion, Scott added Keys.

Lyrics
In general I'm much to lazy to put up lyrics, maybe some nice soul will edit them into this post.

Reviews
Very Monotonous
This song could have been 30 seconds and conveyed the same message. The bombardment of different sounds, feedback, guitar sustain, and just general noise doesn't cover up the quality of recording. Sadly, it only sounds like noise and doesn't convey any message. It's hard to pick the different parts apart because it just sounds like a mess. The vocals were the only audible part of the song, and I only needed to hear that line once and I got the point. I'd re-record this one instrument at a time so you have a little more control over the amount of ambient noise in comparison to the noise that you are looking for. Could be interesting if it was audible...and cut it down to under a minute.
- faz_7E from Cromwell, Connecticut on 11Apr2005

where are you?
cool speed. i enjoy the background singing. the whole mix is a little washed out...but maybe that's on purpose. a better recording would help out a lot.
- moonowl from Johnson City, Tennessee on 9Apr2005

lo-fi sound works
Reminds me of early Ween. Keep the lo-fi sound it works with your loose/improvisational sound. I bet the all your songs are completely different from each other. I think they should be because after an hour of that I would scream.
- Ethiopiate8 from Crystal Lake (Not The Camp), Illinois on 9Apr2005

Very eerie
This song was very eerie but also set a really cool mood. I like the samples you used and how you started the song. It was a little bit repetitive, but that kind of emphasized and exagurated the mood. I loved the way you ended the song too. Its cool mood music.
- kooks from Unspecified on 9Apr2005

poor
Ok well there's nothing special about this track. Everything sound muffled. The vocals are barely audible, and it would be useless trying to understand them. It's experimenral alright, but I don't know where you want to go with this. What's the point ?
- desertedparking from Quebec, Canada on 8Apr2005

Interesting
If you were going for something experimental, kind of a more upbeat Neurosis sound, then it works. But it sure doesn't ahve any mainstream/pop characteristics to it at all. A little heavy on the echoes, kind of gets muddy. Could be balanced better as well, the guitar should be more prominent and the howling should be more ambient -- it just gets in the way as it is... Vocals are pretty good, lyrics are kind of uninspired though. The sound is kind of tinny as well, maybe include something that has some bass to it? Very lose instrumentally, might want to tighen that up a bit, edit out the squeaks and whatnot. Beyond that, very interesting piece. If the B-52s did a lot of LSD it might sound like this, which is a good thing if you ask me.
- kolanos from Reno, Nevada on 8Apr2005

aaahhhh naerly
I guess it depends on where your heads at as far as what your able to handle. It didn't do much for me from asoundscape point of view. I believe that with a soundscape style song it still needs to catch you from the beginning. There is something a little dissonant in ti and it turns me away. But please continue with your style it obviously indiviual.
- Eschalon from Unspecified on 7Apr2005

Oh Very Yeah
Right away the production value shows that a real effort has been put into this piece. This quasi pop song finds several levels in which to experiment. The ambience of the piece is it's stongest feature which very slyly gives way to a structure that made feel I was listening to a punk song heard underwater. By the time I'm making out lyrics I also making out a Joy Division influence. I personally think a wealth of garbage finds it's way into this catagory and I was very pleasently suprised to come across this gem. Actual experimental music in the experimental music catagory, who woulda thunk it? Please keep making music because you are making music interesting.
- sesimon from Nashville, Tennessee on 7Apr2005

makes me wanna scream
i love the ambient intoduction to the song. i think the absense of drums creates an emptiness to the song piece.The vocals are muddy and repetitous remind me of a pere ubu sound. which i think is great. there are some missing elements to making this a great song. I know how i feel when someone makes me scream though.
- bloodybutcher from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma on 6Apr2005

smooth
This is a nicely done ambient track with a very muddy feel. The mixing of all instruments/vocals/effects on an even scale keep the listener almost confused at what to pay attention to - a bold and appreciated choice. There aren't too many key elements one can grab onto other than the vocals, which are almost inaudbile in a Sigur Ros-like way. Very smooth from start to finish.
- bitter_tongues from Austin, Texas on 6Apr2005

scream then
I hear Pere Ubu influence... I'm waiting for the song to drop in, but it's not really coming out of the intro. Has it been mixed low across the board to create a dreamy, detached feel? Or is it just an inadvertantly low-level transfer? And it ended. This could best be described as a collage, good ideas but the noisy mix makes it unnecessarily difficult for the listener to connect with what's going on.
- aquatic_ape from Del Mar, California on 31Mar2005

underwater
had an underwater feel to it in the intro. i like all the blending of sounds but was waiting for a hook to come sooner. the guitar work sounds great if it was more up front with the ambient vocal a bit clearer youd have something here-the substance is there its just the production thats not
- SkyblupinkLtd from Sayville, New York on 31Mar2005

super
yes it sounded like some trippy techno beat, i couldnt tell what you were saying and all i could really understand was the guitar part, it was oddly compelling
- JFW from Apple Valley, California on 30Mar2005

Too wet
Someone pick that phone up! Ok, i see, it's a ring modulator. This piece is really struggling to break through all that reverb and that's a shame - you could have used a lot less on this recording. The song is based on a simple chord progression and someone is reciting a mantra way back there. Only guitars, voice and noise - that could be a song if you didn't leave everything so wet with verb. Dry it up and you could have a good song here.
- bluerat from Malmoe, Skane, Sweden on 30Mar2005

interesting
I dont know if this was intended but it reminded me of a christmas song. Just in the way the melody during the verses mix with the ambient noise. Sounds like jingle bells or something. Other than that, pretty original and intriguing.
- schwagrotto from West Valley City, Utah on 30Mar2005

Extra Credit Awards
Each reviewer (out of the 15 reviews) is allowed to give as many awards as they see fit, the number after each award is the amount of times that aspect got an extra credit vote.

Male Vocals-3
Production-3
Mood-3
Originality-3
Coolest Chill-Out Track-1
Lyrics-1

Friday, April 15, 2005

Drowning Into Darkness

In our continuing effort to teach the world to sing, we here at the Tonto Savalas and Buddha All-Stars blog page are bringing you the award winning album by the Buddha All-Stars, Drowning Into Darkness (that's a real loose version of the word award, my mom said it was the bestest). This is a concept album and considering some of you may not know what the concept of the album is we asked band member Scott Lozon to explain:

You often ask me (at least i've imagined that you've asked me) about the meaning behind some of the Buddha albums, well i just came across one in my mental filing cabinet. Sorry if you don't care or already know, maybe this is as much for me, here we go, in a nutshell (okay maybe a walnutshell), all the buddha albums are about a central character, J, we won't get into the significance behind J's name right now (that's for a later day), well Drowning into Darkness is the story that gets into J's cosmic nature, or at least it leads to the very beginning of that, cosmic may not be the right word, celestial, otherwordly, 4th dimension, oh wait i know, his ability to bend space and time, i guess i got to go forward for this to make any sense. The story/album starts with Jay killing himself, he walks into the water, he's had all he can stand, and he bids this world goodbye, the story then takes place in those fleeting unconcious moments between life and death, he remembers being born and then his childhood passes in a flash, he's already a young man, getting into trouble, tasting the wickedness that this world has to offer, it's all footloose and fancy free, but there are signs pointing to the things that will be his downfall, drunken brawls, objectifying women, drug abuse, then he is a man, he becomes famous and burns out (that's the Wall of Sound album), finally out of the places that held him, he turns to the bottle to ease his weary mind, when he hooks up with a floozy for awhile, they get into a fight and he kills her, tries to hide the body, gets caught, gets sent to the electric chair, they flip the switch...and in those fleeting unconcious moments between life and death, he remembers, he remembers it all, this ain't the first time that he's died and it won't be the last, there's more out there after death, life is just part of the game. This is all to make you a wiser and smarter drinker.

Okay, make of that what you will. Because of space constraints we will be presenting the album one side at a time, with the second side coming in about two weeks. If you would like to stream it, click here. If you would like to go to our host site page and download it click here. As a final note, we would love to hear your feedback on the album or songs that you've listened to, so please leave your comments. Have fun.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Tonto's Reviews

There's a new link in the link section. Where else would it be? UP YOUR ASS, THAT'S WHERE!

Anyway, I know that you're all sick of Garageband, but that doesn't mean I'll stop talking about it. I'm in the process of cataloguing all the reviews done under the TontoSavalas signature. Tonto's Reviews is where you'll find them. As of this posting, there are 196 reviews completed. Not all of them (hahaha) are up yet. I'm a lazy bastard. It'll happen, it'll just happen slowly, so bear with me. After all, it's the simply uncouth to bear against a man.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

One More for the Road

Again the world delivers one of it's true wonders. Behold this season's must have fashion accesory!

Clearing House

Ever wanted to know which sites I bookmark as I'm surfing my way across the web? Well, now you can find out. Here's a selection of recent links. Actually, this is just me clearing out my bookmarks and dressing it up as a post.

Skylines. Insane. The Valve. Carputer. Snapfiles. Dub. Pics. Books. Cleansoftware. Thingie. Nain Rouge. Geometry. Blink. Zen. Gorilla. Chinese. Tools. Searches.

That's it. See you next time I have a bunch of links crowding the place up.

Back Covers

I worked up a couple of back covers for the albums, specifically Manifesto and Some More Heavy Metal. They are still alterable (or scrappable) at this point, so comments would be appreciated. Go have a look. You know where.

Monday, April 11, 2005

Crazy Rant

Ok, I just had the (mis)fortune of reviewing two songs by the band 'Mirima' almost back-to-back. I panned both songs, not knowing they were by the very same band.

Now, I like to see how my reviews compare to what other people are saying about that song. Neither song had any reviews. In fact, as I write this, neither of the reviews I've done has appeared in their song page. It's usually instantaneous, but sometimes it takes a minute to appear.

Now, before I go any farther, let me tell you how the charts work on garageband. Your song starts at the bottom of the pile and it goes up depending on the reviews you get. Pretty simple.

Well, these two songs that hadn't gotten any reviews that I could see- except for the two bad ones that I'd written myself- were not at the bottom of the pile. One was decently up from the bottom and the other was ranked in the top 1/5th of songs in that genre. Well, that's not supposed to happen.

So, I wrote a 'hey, what's up with this?' type of message on the forum. 'It's a bug in the system, thanks for pointing it out' was the response I got. Fair enough.

Did that explain why the reviews hadn't appeared? No, but what the hell. I don't really care that much. Except... something was bugging me about the band.

Mirima already has management(WildWestManagement), if not a record deal. In fact, in the band member listing is Manager: John G. This is atypical of the bands I've seen on this site.

All of this led me to scratch my head and wonder why an already signed band is trying to compete on GB? Well, duh. Street cred, of course, and marketing. And at 19.99 for an upload credit, the four songs Mirima has up are a real bargain. I can't imagine 80 bucks amounts to anything in music marketing. John G got himself a great deal.

Now, you can also do a bunch of reviews in order to upload a song instead of paying, so how do I know that Mr. G payed. Well, you can click on the names of the band members(if they have their own accounts) and see how many reviews they've done. Well, the only clickable name on the list was Manager: John G. And how many reviews had he done? 0. Nada.

Well, who is John G? John Giacobbi is the director of Websheriff and it's parent company ELA. ELA means Entertainment Law Associates, btw. WildWestManagement is another subsidiary of ELA.

Which means, to my cynical ear, that Mr. G's assistant made a mistake including his name in the list of band members. Makes it a little to easy to see the corporate gears in motion. There goes your street cred for anyone who cares to spend a few minutes looking. Which, granted, only a lunatic like me would bother with.

Still got the marketing, though. I spent enough time to write two reviews for him and his band. That really pisses me off. I don't mind listening to crappy music and writing reviews because I know that other people feel the same way about my music, but I really hate being swept along in someone's marketing scheme. John G just made me his bitch and I didn't even know it.

Now, the fact that this band's songs started off a little higher than everyone elses looks a little suspicious. The fact that my scathing reviews haven't yet shown up under their song feels a little suspicious, and 'oh, it's a bug in the system' sounds like... bullshit.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Tonto Savalas and The Buddha All-Stars

So I was listening to pretty much the entire Tonto and Buddha library in a good 3 to 4 hour session, and I started thinking to myself, and I said "Self look at all this crazy insane music that we've done. Tonto Savalas has 11 albums and 234 songs, the Buddha All-Stars have 7 albums and 295 songs (or tracks at least). No normal people should listen to this music for fear of causing mass insanity!" But then I thought, "Ahh Fuck 'em." So I'm here to tell you all about a new game were going to play. Every couple of weeks (or whenever I feel like it), I'm going to ask which Tonto or Buddha album you'd like to hear (go here if you don't know the titles), and I will post that album or more likely a side at a time of that album. All you got to do, is be the first one to leave a comment with the title. Let's see how this shiznit works. Oh yeah, by the way, a track with Rob singing, Adam on Guitar, Tambourines, and Background Vocals, Mick on Guitar, and me on Keys, was voted track of the day on GarageBand, but I'll tell you more about that later.

My Birthday

I know my birthday has passed, and you all understand that there is no chance that I'll get you anything for your birthday, but if anyone wants to get me a belated gift, this is what I want.

Friday, April 08, 2005

Pretentious Artwork Alert

I made a bunch of pictures, then I posted them on flikr. These are the words informing you of these facts. Previews and links, of course, are in the zeitgeist boxes down the right hand side of the page. Feel free to express your worship, disinterest, derision, disgust and/or titillation. Especially the titillation.

In other news, my horrible obsession with Garageband continues. I've decompressed from my earlier rant about the site and I've found- to my lasting horror- that I truly enjoy writing music reviews. Spend way too much time doing them. Let's plug some numbers. Joined the site on March 23, so I've been a member for 17 days. In that time, the two of us doing reviews have completed 73 pairs- or 146 seperate music reviews. I'm too lazy to actually divide those numbers, but it's a lot. Trust me.

Who's funeral would you have rather attended, the pope's or GG Allin's?

Enough. Leave me now.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

The First Day of Autumn

Hello Everybody
In our continuing series of songs being reviewed on GarageBand.com, we have made our way through the review cycle of "The First Day of Autumn" here is all the info about the song and the reviews that it received. Reviewers are also able to give extra credit to certain elements of a song, a list of the extra credit awards will be shown after all the reviews. A quick note on our previous song “Soup Turtles”, I incorrectly listed Mick as playing backwards keys, it was actually backwards guitar, that and the extra credit awards have been added to the "Soup Turtles" post. See you next time with “She Keeps Talking To Me”

The First Day of Autumn (7:08)

Score 3.1 out of 5.0
#117 of 186 in Current Experimental Rock
#682 of 1,328 in All-Time Experimental Rock

History
This song appears on the Tonto Savalas album, Close The Kitchen. This song was done in October of 1998. We had Jeff on Vocals, Adam on Guitar, Mick on Drums, Rob on Bass, and Scott on Keys. It was an improvisational recording. Unfortunately this was recorded with one microphone for everything, I'm pretty sure it was hanging from the ceiling. The singers microphone disconnects from the amplifier halfway through. There were many highs and lows on many different instruments throughtout this recording, so I put it through an EQ effect to even it out a little bit, messed with the pan a little, and the rest is history. On a side note, in checking over the master tape of this song, I was able to decipher the lyrics, "Doing it with my Zebra pants," which I had never heard before. What a nice surprise!

Lyrics
There's alot of stuff about it being the first day of October.

Reviews
recommended with some good pod
Retro is hot, very hot. More and more bands are making retro music. One even more retro than the other, of even more retro than retro.
This one is just balancing on the edge. The guitarplayer is not tight at all, but the massive amount of vintage sound effects cover that up nicely. Just like the vocalist. Half the time his screaming pushes all the other instruments away and there's nothing left but crisps and random distortion. 7 minutes can then be very long.
When made in de 70's this was probably a brilliant trip, but now I know there better trips I go fore those.
- Nynke from Groningen, Netherlands on 4Apr2005

uninhibited
This song is powereful in delivery and rolling intensity. At first the vocals seems to overpower, while the instrumentation lags behind - but, the music and vocals soon conjoin harmoniously to create a surge of pure helter skelter rock and roll. The cadence that this song reaches is pervasive, sharpened even further by its jamming instrumental at the end. I really like the live feel to it, it was actually a relief - no pretention there. What made this song stand out was its canvas of sound that was actually able to create a balanced chaos.
- Tutunaru from Los Angeles, California on 4Apr2005

Messy energy
Until about 30 seconds into this, i was really liking this, but then for about 15 seconds, it got really messy. what happened to the drums? as they went down the toms, they were really muddy and off beat! i think i preferred the vox when they werent screaming - although the screaming is actually quite effective in this song. the quality of the recording here is terrible - and that might be taking away from the song's overall listenability. what i can hear properly sounds interesting. the voice sets off nicely from the instrumentation. if you could capture the messy sound properly (even keeping the out of tune guitars), this would sound pretty cool. theres a hell of a lot of energy here which is always a good start.
- EdwinMiles from Budaiya, State Of, Bahrain on 4Apr2005

Great ideas, iffy execution.
I really like what you guys are trying to go for, and hope you get there. I hope you do cause it could be amazing if you were too.
- clayman24 from Simsboro, Louisiana on 3Apr2005

I like the blues
The blues sound good man i like the style. It sounds good keep up the crazy experimental style.
- CONSCENDER from Reno, Nevada on 3Apr2005

uuugghhhhhh
uuughh, where is the intro.
nononono, you guys...structure this out. the production is bad. i bet you would be a good live band, this sounds recorded live. sounds like you made this while you were drunk, i am not drunk and it is kinda irritating because i think yuo guys are good musicians that are unfocesed. terrible production. hurts my ears. uuughhhh. c'mon guys fix this awful sound, he sounds like he has a great rock voice but this is hurtin my ears.
- brandoncruz from Unspecified on 2Apr2005

In what decade are we living?
Jimmy Hendrix slammed into the Who just after taking a pill that makes them all fly high in the sky!!! Boy That was hard for me That's it I'm pissed off enough of that Hippy music please!
- Lera from Quebec, Canada on 1Apr2005

Band practice jam
I think it's fair to say that the guitar is the only essential part in this musical marathon. I guess you never know what to expect when browsing experimental rock, but i though the experimental side meant it was going to be unconventional and show me a new way of making a record. This just shows me that if I record a band practice jam I can sell it as an experimental song. Very uninspiring with no real substance to it.
- dont_tread_on_my_badger from Unspecified on 1Apr2005

yikes!
It's really hard to get past the production on this one. It sounds like it was recorded live through one microphone out in the house. The quality is so poor it's almost impossible to examine the song, but I'll try. The guitar riffs that are used are very intricate and original. Nice use of the modes. The vocalist has a lot of passion. I can't tell what his tone or styling are like due to the recording, but I can feel his passion. Nice solo section, some cool use of dissonance around 3:40. Take the time to record this song for real and let's see what you've got. I wonder if you put in experimental rock because of how crappy the recording is.
- SlySinger from Chesterfield, Virginia on 31Mar2005

Great vocals
Great emotional weirdo vocals. I'd comment on everything else, but for me it all serves as an appropriate background to hear this totally compelling guy rant and rave over top of it. I love it love it love it. A great sense of humor and kind of substance-abuser aesthetic. The guitar serves the song very well. Keep doing what you're doing. It's pretty anthemic when the chorus comes in and the guy starts really screaming. GREAT.
- jonvisger from Ypsilanti, Michigan on 31Mar2005

hmmm
Well in my oppinion it sounds like bad pop from the 70's. Nothing I haven't heard before, vocals are irritating due to the inconsistency of the singer and the other instruments clash at times. Structure is good, tight live play, but thats about it.
- schwagrotto from West Valley City, Utah on 31Mar2005

Drunken jam
Sounds like a fun drunken wild jam. Vocals had a slight bit of a jimi feel to it-until the screaming-that was cool. Would be fun to see live wasted. I would like to see how this would sound professionally done.
- SkyblupinkLtd from Sayville, New York on 31Mar2005

funky funk
This song has a funky groove. The drummer gets the mood going upbeat.
Sounds very lo-fi. The highlight is where every thing gets loud, the singer starts screaming and that guitatr riff rocks. Good job there. Kind of reminds me of a song off of Beck's Mellow gold albume. from begining to end this track don't lose it's groove.
- yep_this_one from Reynoldsburg, Ohio on 30Mar2005

Good
Bad production. I could really enjoy it is it was recorded better. The instruments need to be roped in with some good production. But... who cares what i think????
- EvilDrGonzo from West Henrietta, New York on 30Mar2005

great stuff
Sound like some old classic-prog rock song. The guitar is really great. The production could use touch up, but in a way, the poor production add to this old records vibe. Like if you did this track some 30 years ago, and just recently found it.
Love those freak out, noisy part...the voice is great too, and even though the drum is kind of hard to hear, it's great to.
Hey it's a pretty amazing track.
4/5
- desertedparking from Quebec, Canada on 29Mar2005

Howlin all the way
This is one noisy recording, but the singer makes it worth the listen. I thought it was one sampled Howlin' Wolf at first, but then i realized that this guy really sings on this recording (not howlin... the other guy that really sings here... oh, this got complicated). The guitars are excellent and i love it all the way. It's neurotic, spacy and freakin' insane all the way through. Never try to record this again in a real studio - you'll never get this feeling again. Trust me.
- bluerat from Malmoe, Skane, Sweden on 29Mar2005

Almost reminiscent of Blues Explosion
That who you remind me of. John Spencer Blues Explosion. This is pretty off the wall, due to the singer, but this is the type of thing that's get you paying attention at a show. The music is decent, yet a little hard to determine what's happening individually, due to poor production. I like the guitar part throughout the 2 minute section. My only complaints are the production and the length of the song.
- ECSean from Louisville, Kentucky on 29Mar2005

Blues.
Solid beat, engaging guitar. I am not a stickler for quality, because lo fi sounds are just as good as hi fi. This makes me want to get up and dance the night away. The synth, or the...noise maker in the background definitely brings a great mood to this song overall.
- atomiskcity from High Ridge, Missouri on 28Mar2005

7:08
Singer is reminisent of Jim Morrison on Acid. But when was Jim Morrison not on Acid? Liking the Guitar Solo at 3:04.

After a while is sounds like a music marathon contest for the Guinnes world record book.

This could be good at a live concert where everyone is stoned and needing to rock out for a very long time.

Really not sure if someone died at the end of this one
- BushLeagueband from Newwestminster, British Columbia, Canada on 28Mar2005

one screaming motherfucker
Wild morrison like vocal, find some howling wolf warmth but this song is preety basic for what they call experimental. The crazy vox keep the song fun, but the production makes it a straight waste of time. The guitar is decent and the vintage thing is in full effect.
- mrarashi from Reno, Nevada on 28Mar2005

Extra Credit Awards
Each reviewer (out of the 20 reviews) is allowed to give as many awards as they see fit, the number after each award is the amount of times that aspect got an extra credit vote.

Mood-4
Drums-4
Beat-3
Most Rocking Track-3
Guitars-3
Male Vocals-3
Originality-2
Production-2
Melody-2
Bass-1
Programming-1
Stupidest Song I've Ever Heard-1

On GarageBand they have a section titled "Reviewers' Picks" these are sorted by genre, songs within each genre receiving the most Extra Credit Awards for a specific element become the song of the week for that element. Well I just noticed while looking through the charts, that "The First Day of Autumn" was awarded the reviewers pick award for the week of April 4th, in the category of "Most Rocking Track," way to go Tonto!!!

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Saul Bellow

Saul Bellow died today. One of those authors I always meant to read more of. Henderson the Rain King has been on my 'to read' list forever.

As I further reveal my true geekhood

I've just read a craptastic load of comics books, and because I know that no one reading this would trade a week-old rat-chewed bologna sandwich (on wheat) for a comic book, I'm going to tell you all about them! Yay for me!

100 Bullets #59- Awesome series and I'm hoping it wraps up before I completely forget what the hell is going on. Azzarello continues to give me sex, drugs and murder done for any and every conceivable reason. Warning for anyone new to this series: takes a bit to figure out what's going on, but well worth the time.
100 Girls #4- Don't know anything about this one. The art is that primary color cartoony half manga style that's making the rounds. Not my style, but seemed decent.
303 #4 - Garth Ennis doing a bitter old soldiers story. I've missed issues #2 and #3 which means I've no real idea what's going on, but it wasn't hard to pick up and read on it's own. Good stuff.
Amazing Spider-Man #518- eh, it was ok spiderman.
Birds of Prey #80- I've read more issues of this than I care to admit. I always figure I'll give it a quick flip through and look at the cartoon babes in their sexy spandex. Then I start reading the story and I get to the end and yell, "damn you, Gail Simone, for writing an entertaining comic book!"
Daredevil v2 #71- I'm an unabashed Brian Micheal Bendis fan and Daredevil is one of the major reasons why. In fact, I've written to him offering to lick his bald head up to a nice shine, but he hasn't written back... Good stuff and I've grown to love Alex Maleev's art, too.
New Avengers #4- Brian Micheal Bendis couldn't write a decent comic book if someone shoved Stan Lee up his ass. Avengers Disassembled, my tookus! That said, The New Avengers hasn't been bad. Screw you, Bendis!
Runaways v2 #2- Really liked the first run of Runaways; v2 has yet to grab me the same way. If I recall, the first series started a little slow, as well, so I'll keep reading.
Seven Soldiers - Guardian #1- Another pellet in Grant Morrison's current shotgun approach to comics. Pirates in the subways, a newspaper by and for the people, what will this maniac come up with next. Entertaining and better than Seaguy, which was crap. Take that Morrison!
Sleeper Season 2 #10- Great comic. I think it's being cancelled, which is a damn shame. This one and 100 Bullets are great comics for non-comic readers.
The Authority Revolution #6- This was a pretty good issue, but the series as a whole has had major ups and downs since Ellis left. That was a long time ago. I keep reading because I like the characters, oh, and because it's got ultra-violence and boobies.
Wonder Woman v2 #214- Not even flashbacks to the pre-pubescent stirrings of my groin as Lynda Carter jumped over yet another wall in that skimpy outfit can make me read Wonder Woman.
Captain America v5 #4- Ed Brubaker takes Cap to his territory by giving us an involved spy story. Good stuff, but I've always been a sucker for Captain America. I can remember reading CA comics in the late 80's. I knew they were pretty crappy, but I read 'em anyway. It's Captain America, how can you hate him?
Exiles #61- Exiles is a comic geek's wet dream. I mean, they brought back Magick! Illyana Rasputin! Ok, my dork juices are a'flowin all over. My apologies. This is usually a fun, but directionless series, but this story arc actually seems to be going somewhere. Odd.
Invincible #21- One of the very best superhero comics out today. I've read a bunch of Kirkman's comics and a lot of them get a resounding 'eh,' but Invincible is top notch. It's had one of the best plot twists I've ever read. It's light, it's fun and it's still got meat on it's bones. Hope this keeps going for a long time.
Noble Causes #8- Noble Causes is on version 4 or 9 or something, so don't let the numbering fool you. This is pure soap opera and it's a gorgeous mix of genres. This one is highly recommended.
Stormbreaker the Saga of Beta Ray Bill #3- Rather pretentious title, eh? Especially since the title character is a horse-faced alien Thor clone from a 1980's storyline. The thing is, that run of Thor was one of my all time favorite (Thor also spent several issues as a frog) storylines. I haven't seen the first two issues of this comic, but this one has some backstory and a nicely epic cosmic battle- plus a hot demon chick is freed from space hell! What more could you ask for?
The Human Race #01- This looks like a promising mini-series. It's got good art, a pretty standard set up and it got us some action on the quick. Not much characterization beyond the intros, but it's the first issue. I'll keep reading this one.
Ultimate Spider-Man #74- I got to tell y'all- I loves me some Ultimate Spiderman. Being the young and chipper young (young, I tell you!) youth that I am, I missed reading the original spiderman comics as they came out. Oh, sure I went back and read them, but it wasn't the same; with all those old comics being crap and all. Ultimate Spiderman resets it all, no years of backstory, no thirty- year old Peter Parker, no Mary Jane as Supermodel. This is the good stuff. Bagley does a fantastic job on the art and Bendis writes the hell out of this one and he's been doing it for 74 issues. That's an awe-inspiring run for any comic these days. Bendis is a genius and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Except for that whole Avengers Disassembled thing. You suck, Bendis!
Ultimate X-Men #57- Everything I said about Ultimate Spiderman applies to this one, too, just not quite as good.
Ultimates v2 #4- Now, this one is Ultimate Avengers and it's a different animal altogether. This is ultra-hip, media-savvy and adult. Thor is a lunatic (so we are led to believe)hippy, Iron Man's a full on drinken womanizer socialite, Ant/Giant Man is a wifebeater, Captain America is a hard-nosed asskicker and so on... It's awesome. And Bryan Hitch is one of the best artists out there.
Uncanny X-Men #457- Good lord, I can't even bring myself to read this anymore.
Vimanarama #2- Again with the Grant Morrison shotgun effect. This one has superheroes from eastern mythos battling it out for the fate of the world. Oh, and a love story. I'm quite enjoying this one.
Young Avengers #2- Apart from the silly names, silly premise and one major case of unexplained time distortion, I like this book. Will it go anywhere? Who knows.

That's it. Resist the urge to dress in spandex and resume your regularly schduled lives.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Soup Turtles

Hello Everybody
As you may or may not know, we recently signed up with GarageBand.com. The site promotes user to user reviews of music. The first song that we submitted was “Soup Turtles”, it has finished going through the review cycle, here is all the info about the song and the reviews that it received. See you next time with “The First Day of Autumn”

Soup Turtles

Score 3.0 out of 5.0
#134 of 200 in Current Experimental Rock
#790 of 1,330 in All-Time Experimental Rock

Vocals and Backwards Guitar-Scott
Background Vocals and Backward Guitar-Mick

History
This song appears on the Buddha All-Stars album, Tripping Through Oblivion, Disc 1. This song was done one track at a time, in about 20 minutes. First take recording on all tracks. The final mix was done immediately after, taking about 10 minutes. Amount of time spent on this song, 30 minutes. The bulk of the lyrics were taken from notes I had written for a nutrition class in college, with sprinkles of improvisational lyrics thrown in.

Lyrics
Migration of the marine turtles
To the soup kitchens and detention centers
With their greenbacks floating through them
Turtle singing
Turtle swimming
Turtle sinking down into the sea
Give me mushrooms
Watching the dark full moon
Fall from the rosewood branches
Margarine has a high smoking point
Margarine
Soup Turtles


Reviews
what the hell?
I'm all about the experimental music but... this was noise to me.
Sounded like 4 guys sitting drunk around a microphone trying to create distortion effects with their mouths while one key on a keyboard is held.
I'm not impressed.
- schwagrotto from West Valley City, Utah on 30Mar2005

ok
Ok well the music here is great, I love those backward sound. But the vocals are just not my style really. It was probably intentional, but I just found them bad. It kind of sad because the background really sound amazing. You're one of those rare band who actually deserve the tag experimental on this website.
3/5
- desertedparking from Quebec, Canada on 29Mar2005

no way.
I definately dig the intro. The vocal track is interesting, i actually like it. seems a bit on the weird side like tool. I dont like some parts in the song, kind of sounds like a silent hill game soundtrack at some points. Overall ... besides the intro this track is horrible.
- IncisionX from East Syracuse, New York on 29Mar2005

Wallflower psycho brains
I dig this piece, its a challenge to listen to without being un melodic or un feeling toward the listener. The disruptive tendencies of the vocals and the poor production coincide well with the song and in no means ruins it. Not a sing a long, but who cares, its interesting, overtly hip and careless, all on purpose, a great excecution.
- mrarashi from Reno, Nevada on 29Mar2005

Extremely experimental
I like the first minute. Reminds me a bit of Thom Yorke's experiments in Radiohead records after OK Computer. The whining in the very beginning before actual words are uttered is fantastic, as well as the reverse notes in the background.

Towards 1:00 the whining becomes annoying and starts breaking the symbiosis built with the accompaniment.

Towards 1:16 when things become hectic I think the whole thing loses proportion and moves from something weird to just annoying. The leading vocal track becomes too dominant, and overshadows all th rest.

If you want things to get thicker and crazier there are other, more complex and exciting means to achieve that effect, without making the listener want to close his ears or turn ur track way down. You could add more parts to the accompaniment, add sparkling sounds in the background, unexplained noises coming from all sides of the stereo field like a hand clap, or a thunder roll, or someone running, or something completely different.

Just making the vocals louder and shouting as u progress doesn't do the trick, and IMO ruins all the great tension and eeriness u achieve in the first minute.

So put a little elbow grease into it, u can do much better.
- BoazPeleg from Haifa, Israel on 29Mar2005

Paul is dead - Paul is dead
Whoa! Reversed messages and a juvenile singer. Could it be any better? This sure is experimental and you are trying to broaden your horizons in a very talented way. The final touch would be to get your singer to actually sing in pitch. It would lift this song severel steps on the ranking scale.
- bluerat from Malmoe, Skane, Sweden on 29Mar2005

Rip that shit tomas
Beck stereopathic, if you got an inside joke keep it that way, it sounds like you're dying run over by a car on acid too messed up to know that you have nothing below the pecs left and people go ahead and drive by you really fast, cuz you've all got a mullet. But holy crap, you just keep squawking and hopefully one of those 65mph tires will squash the head and end this travesty.
- xMTone from Columbus, Ohio on 28Mar2005

I actually, really, really like this song.
The ambience and sound manipulation is top notch in this. The vocals convey feeling, and that is my main judgement about vocals. Great piece of work, my friend. Keep it up. This does have the tone of early Modest Mouse though.
- atomiskcity from High Ridge, Missouri on 28Mar2005

crazy
AHhh this is some funky shit! Im actually scared right now but my god what is it!? OHahh this is fuckin crazy i like it! just crazy!
- ninthfloorview from Ingleside, Ontario, Canada on 28Mar2005

Beautiful!!
beautiful!!Oh I just said that!?
This reminds me of a song that I love by Mercury Rev but this is much more f$@ked up!
Too much time on your hands?Very drunk one evening?Or a musical genius?
- zantetzuken from Surrey, British Columbia, Canada on 28Mar2005

tape stretcher
I like the earie tape stretching sound you have here. The vocals a very interesting on the edge of disturbing. This sounds very psychedelic, pretty crazy trip your on, but well executed. Ween on even more drugs... I wonder what this track sounds like in the context of the record, or a show maybe.
- diskoPunk5C from Hollywood, California on 27Mar2005

Voop Vooop Voop Vup Backwardsy in a good way
Pretty cool. Very hard to criticize as this track is defintely an anything goes tyope of track. I like the pairing of the vocals with the backwards guitar. It works well at setting a certainly strange mood. Could there be an third sound that could be added? Maybe a super repetitive beat produced by a spoon on a table.

As ar as answering "who do we sound like" I honestly have no clue. This sounds like a hidden track a band with an idea had keeping them up late at night. Good fun.
- garpike from Los Angeles, California on 27Mar2005

noitcudorP is OK, I guess
Very backward. Annoying like the mosquito I seem to hear. I love backward, but not when the whole song is like that. But as an experiment I guess it's OK. We're all free to experiment. noitcudorP is OK, I guess
- dotwood from Genk, Limburg, Belgium on 27Mar2005

I,m on acid again
I remember being on acid listening to my friends car sterio that he some how got to play back wards I think this song was on it.
- infrasound from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada on 26Mar2005

That sounds crazy
It sounds like a mesquito attacking me. I think you sound like the early butthole surfers. And you have been eating too many mushrooms.
- EvilDrGonzo from West Henrietta, New York on 25Mar2005

Insane
I used to do acid. A lot. A whole lot. In my head, I heard this. This is the kind of thing only truly deranged people could make or enjoy. I kinda like it. It is horrible, but I like it. I laughed. It sounds a little like Ween's Pure Guava album, a little like Negativeland and a little like a a fly getting caught in a feedback machine. Ever hear Lou Reed's Metal Machine Music? There you go. You sound like that, only not as good.
- KrisNAmber from Palm Bay, Florida on 25Mar2005

Trippy
Really liked the reverse sound,,sounds like a twisted accordian.
great experimenting with vocal techniques,,,almost acoustic science.
- Dethkit from Pointy Biro, North Wales, United Kingdom on 25Mar2005

experimental noise AB's
Who do you sound like?
You remind me Virgin Prunes ore one of those experimental goth from the 80's with some of ween and some of residents.

So, it not that original
....anyways you earned points by making the track length short and proving that is not necesary to use 11 minutes to do experimental music...

But I definitely this could have been done better if any interest on from the side of the band.

even noise and punk and experimental requires of arranging and orchetrating, a none of than is shown in this track. sound to improv and it doesn't hold well.....to me at list. but who I'm to talk anyways.
- chulosilache from Brooklyn, New York on 25Mar2005

Bag of bollox
Who do we sound like ...? hmmm
Well you sound like you're up yer own asses and you can't quite sing. This must mean loads to the artist ot is it just piussing about.
I know a lot of experimental stuff, but this is just sh*t - poor quality ... if you're gunna do stuff when you're high at least mix it when someones sober.
How can anyone write something nice about this piece of rank entertainment ... grow up lol.
You sound like you need a slap ...
- FlyingSmee from Barnsley, Yorkshire, United Kingdom on 25Mar2005


Extra Credit Awards
Each reviewer (out of the 20 reviews) is allowed to give as many awards as they see fit, the number after each award is the amount of times that aspect got an extra credit vote.

Originality-6
Mood-4
Male Vocals-2
Production-2
Programming-2
Stupidest Song I've Ever Heard-2
Keyboards-1
Melody-1
Lyrics-1
Best Feel Good Track-1

Monkey Chant

The Ramayana Monkey Chant. Found via Warren Ellis, who always finds good shite and writes great comics. Long download, but interesting as hell and worth it.

Speaking of great comics, read Achewood.It's got blogs.

Keep on Truckin'

Sometimes, the world is just wonderful.
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